Grandpa and a trip to 6 Flags

It’s all for grandma.  Shane’s grandma.  Kaytlynn and Harrison’s great-grandma.  In just a few hours we will be leaving for California.  A good family road trip packed tighter than a sardine can is actually exciting to me.  Something about leaving after work, racing against the clock and sleep for the thrill of seeing grandma’s face light up and that big squeeze we will get.  We might as well be Hollywood movie stars, as excited as she is to see us.  The great sense of being wanted.  Grandma always wants us, loves us and dotes on us.

This time is a little different.  We are going to say goodbye.  Grandpa’s body is feeble. His once tall body and demanding stature is melting. While physical aging can be difficult to watch, much less embrace, seeing his body deteriorate is not as difficult as his person being absent. What we have enjoyed about grandpa, his love of Westerns, playing cards for hours, walking the golf course nearly everyday is no longer part of him. He always loved his grand kids and cherished time spent with them. When he doesn’t know their names or who they are, it just doesn’t feel right.  Grandpa had his quirky side too. Sleeping straight up with his mouth wide open, never removing his tall sport cap perched on the very top of his head or the way he liked grandma to wait on him all the time. Does he know who we are past the blank stare?

Grandpa loved Jesus. When he talked of heaven and his savior there almost always was a tear in his eye.  He sang along with the old hymns on Sunday mornings and that was the only time his hat was off out of his deep reverence.  I always felt like grandpa had a special connection with Jesus.  He loved to talk of the cross and what Jesus had done for him.  There was a sense of respect for his past being washed away and made new.  The freedom he found in being a new person was something he wanted so much for all of his children,  grandchildren and great-grandchildren.  At special family holiday meals grandpa rarely could pray without being emotional praying for the family he loved so dearly.

The memories of the grand-kids and the great-grands do vary a bit.  Shane can recall the younger agile grandpa who used to jump in the pool and have contests of who could hold their breath the longest, and of course he always won.  The annual New Year’s Eve party with all of the cousins, eating snacks, playing cards and watching the parade never grew old. Grandpa and grandma both were always interactive and very attentive, they always played.  And being short on cash was never a problem because grandma always had some chores we could do to make a little cash!

Grandmas dedication to grandpa over the decades in nothing less than astounding.  While grandpa was wonderful in many ways, his health really struggled.  Midway through grandpa’s career, still too early to retire, he became injured at work causing paralysis in his neck.  Leaving his life as a welder and the extremely heavy helmet became necessary.  Colon cancer, diabetes and insulin shots several times a day, kidney failure and dialysis and finally Alzheimer’s, grandma has been quite the nurse and still is.  Grandma has beat the odds, fighting through a failed marriage during a time when the culture shunned a single mom, working hard without the help of the system and she waited tables and worked full time in a career at Kmart.  She earned her keep.  When grandpa got sick the first time, she cleaned houses so she never had to leave him at home more than a few hours alone at a time.  And then later she had her booths with ceramics and crafts and always worked hard to supplement their income.  While grandma enjoys getting out to play bingo and volunteer with her senior group, she doesn’t leave grandpa now.  Now when it’s hardest and she is still so young at heart she doesn’t leave him.  She is dedicated to caring for him.

Grandpa had a great laugh and loved to chuckle when he pulled one over on you.  Not only did he love to play cards, he often had a magic trick ready to be demonstrated.  He loved Twinkies, Hostess pies, junk food in general and never went without his Pepsi or a big glass of milk.  On those hot summer days he insisted on fresh ice each and every time filled to the top.  In 36 hours of him arriving at our house, our ice machine would be begging for mercy!  Did I mention him and grandma would make the drive every summer to come stay with us for a couple of weeks and love on us?  Making jam and cookies and potty training Harrison.  There is just nothing like having a grandma and grandpa coming to visit.

Grandma is so smart, so careful to be mindful of grandpa’s wishes and has been an incredible wife all of these years.  She can make jerky & peanut butter cookies to make any grand-kid survive broke through college.  Yes, we speak from experience, Shane and me.

Saying goodbye to grandpa is really hard.  Even when he probably won’t remember who we are, we still remember that man that once was who loved walking outside and greeting the neighbors and yelling loudly at “his” Rams when they weren’t showing their stuff.  I hope we will hold the memories close, see past what the present looks like and be thankful for his full life.  Be thankful for the time we have had and be grateful we know he will spend eternity with Jesus when his time comes.

Besides saying goodbye, we have much to look forward to this weekend, a very Happy Thanksgiving with thousands of cousins, hah!  and a little treat of a day at 6 flags.  We get to hold on tightly to grandma, see grandpa and love on him with the hope that he will know he is loved.  It’s time to be thankful for the years we have had and to really cherish each and every moment we have while we have it.

We love you Grandma and Grandpa